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Crossing Borders
Volume 8, Number 1 - Fall 2009
Story Leads to Tolerance
by Pat Smith
In September 2008, I coordinated a Crossing Borders group in Trenton, made up of girls between the ages of twelve and seventeen. They were a part of a youth mentoring organization dedicated to encouraging young people to participate in the creative arts.
In the first session, it was clear to me that one girl, a 16-year-old, was outside of the core group. Whenever she made comments, the other girls poked fun at her. They talked about her hair (which was cut in what I thought was a very cute “punk” style). They taunted her manner of speech and dress. I often tried to bring the discussions in the groups around to tolerance, but to no avail.
In our fourth session we discussed “Chin” by Gish Jen, about a young boy who watches through his apartment window as a neighbor boy is beaten by his father. The neighbors are Chinese, and the story, both sad and humorous, is filled with stereotypes about how Chinese people look, act, speak and eat.
The girl who had been ostracized spoke up in defense of the Chinese boy. She said that for most of her teen years, she’d been receiving the same type of treatment from her peers. The other girls listened intensely.
Afterward, I steered the group into a discussion about stereotyping, bullying, and racial tolerance. The girls agreed that most of them are guilty of teasing others. They also admitted that they had been teasing this girl simply because she went to a different school, was in honors classes and spoke using very little of the slang that was common among them.
They admitted to using stereotypes to prejudge this girl. Some apologized. From that week until the end, the tension between the girls grew lighter each week.
Later, the director of the program commented on the difference she saw in the group members’ treatment of the ostracized girl. Some—though not all—of the girls made an effort to be civil; they even allowed her to ride with them on one of their outings to see The Secret Life of Bees. The girls weren’t really friends, she said, but they were no longer enemies.